I spent the first part of my life accumulating knowledge and a sense of self.
Who was I?
What was I supposed ot be doing in life?
What was my purpose?
The more I accumulated the heavier I got. I wasn't aware of this at the time, but I did experience the symptoms of it.
I was trying to figure it out. I was using something limited - my knowledge and intellect - to try to decipher something unlimited and unknowable - like the universe and my place in it.
I traversed those mountains, banging my head against the wall for a while until I saw that all the accumulated baggage of my past was the cause of why my journey through life was so heavy, so confusing, so hard. I had to let all this accumulated knowledge - who I thought I was - go.
But then I found out it was hard to let it go. All the accumulated stuff was who I was. I had formed an identity from it.
So I had to let go of it piece by piece.
Some I let go freely. Some I had to endure the pain of carrying it until it became too much. Some of it I still can see how it has its hooks in. Some parts of myself have led me into dark spaces where I have to rediscover who I want to be apart from my past habits. It's all old habits, old ways of being, old patterns. Most of them are not even mine, they are inherited from generations before me. All of it is limiting, fear-based and conflicted.
The key is clearing ourselves out. Recognizing and letting go of all these old patterns. Creating what we want in the moment and inventing a future that we are excited to live into.
Our capacity to create and ideate our own reality is power.
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